Starting Over to Begin Again, by Wendy DeRaud

Before I went to bed last night, I began obsessing about rearranging my studio space once again.

 

 

It has become crowded since Mark had started painting and working out in there, and I wanted breathing room.

So today I started clearing things out in order to rearrange the room the way I had imagined. It involved some sweeping, mopping, hanging of paintings, tacking up of drawings, arranging all sorts of vignettes, making sure the view outside to my garden was the focal point and the real inspiration. 

 

You see, all of this is what I need to do in order to finally begin painting again.

 

I am making all sorts of excuses for myself as to why I can’t start, like I’m focusing on writing right now.

True, but I can do both, I do have the time right now.

But there’s something missing in my inner-motivational-mindset. When that happens and I’m stuck, it’s time to make the outside look like the inside - make a change in the external environment. Rearrange my world to match my interior orientation.

 

 

 

 

 

Sometimes I need to take out my magnifying glass and look more closely to see what’s going on, there inside the inner sanctum of my creative soul.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It’s okay if I’m not doing what I think I should be doing, there’s a reason why I’m not there yet.

 

So time to rearrange and make things clean and pretty. Time to look over some of my old work and remember how good it feels to be in the Zone. Time to watch Mark paint a portrait commission he’s trying to get done by Mother’s Day, and get myself inspired.

 

 

 

 

I saw an old plaque I got as a gift several years ago: Prayer Changes Things. I had just read a good quote about that.

 

 

 

 

 

“To say that “prayer changes things” is not as close to the truth as saying, “Prayer changes me and then I change things.” God has established things so that prayer, on the basis of redemption, changes the way a person looks at things. Prayer is not a matter of changing things externally, but one of working miracles in a person’s inner nature.” Oswald Chambers

 

Oswald is right. I’m the one who is being changed by God, day by day, in my inner nature, and this is changing the way I look at things, even here in my little studio. I’m noticing change more easily and accepting it more. I'm better able to let go of the past in order to move forward.

 

 

Maybe soon I'll be ready to paint again.